Nerves

I'm speaking in church on Sunday. Along with some of my favorite, fabulous women. We're speaking about camp - the good, the bad and the spiritual.

I'm telling myself to combat the nerves and enjoy the ride. What do you do for nerves?

And would you like to come sit in and offer some moral support? Email me. I'd love it if you could. Mormons don't bite, promise. Even the vampire obsessed ones.

Of course writing about camp is causing me to reminisce about the good times we had.

The seriously? face.

Laughter. Belly-hurting, tear-inducing laughter.

Making an absolute fool of myself.

Camparific

Found my inner teen last week at Girls Camp. Oh it is there. Stuffing my face with junk food, belly laughing, and doing my best to avoid any drama llama.

Because of work and school and a desire to be up there as much as possible,  I went on Tuesday night after work with one of the other leaders for a few hours, and then went to work and class on Wednesday and got up early and got back to camp on Thursday. I stayed Thursday night and helped pack up Friday. I can't imagine how the other adults felt, I was achy after one night. The week was a whirlwind. 

I hate camping. And I don't know much about what needs to be done, so I just try to go there with the attitude to help as much as I can and hopefully it works. Girls camp is just a staple of the LDS church's Young Women's program, and the Mormon teen girl experience. I went every year as a teen, and now I'm going as a adult leader. Our ward -- church group -- had nine girls go. I don't know how many Young Women there were total, but it seemed like a lot.

To show my complete lack of camping know-how, I completely forgot a flashlight. I guess I thought the nighttime would be powered by electricity?

I did try to put myself to good use French braiding, a skill I'm not very great at, but I've picked up on it since becoming a Young Womens leader. I promise you I was not forcing her to get her hair done, she asked! She looks thrilled!

The group on the hike, posing in front of "Twilight" trees. They said they looked like the ones from the movie. They were all a little crazed because they had to be at camp the same time the movie came out. I tried not to spoil it with my thoughts. (they've been stated). 

The gal who planned the whole thing. The theme was Amazing Race and each group of campers was a place. It was an odd combo of entire continents like Asia and territories like Puerto Rico. We were somewhere in the middle with Ireland. Hawaii was also featured. 

We hiked to a herd of cattle. I'm not even kidding. It was beautiful though. A grouping of rocks, a pond and some cows.

I love California for its ability to go from beach to mountains in 60 minutes. Of course this isn't very green, but the drive up was pretty and mountainous.

Plenty of games and plenty of goofiness. Loved it. We played a lot of "who's most likely to..." debated Team Jacob vs. Team Edward and heard a lot of Justin Bieber. They aren't allowed to have cell phones or ipods or anything tech at camp, so they serenaded us with the songs from memory. I was impressed -- they know all the words. 

A make-up free shot. I'm still breaking out post-camp. Camping and I clearly don't get along. 

It was so much fun. I love the opportunity to spend time with these girls. I consider it a blessing and a privilege. They make my life so much better and lift my spirits, what more could a girl ask for? 

Vintage temple bag

I am excited to go to the temple this weekend, and oops, it may not be just because of how I feel when I am there.

Picked up this little suitcase in Utah at Decades, a secondhand store. I'm almost positive this bag was designed to be a temple bag years ago. It has all the right pockets and my dress, which is similar to this one, will fit perfectly inside.
It has a little black mark on it, but that's OK. I like black.

Currently

Last year it was the Spice Girls. This year for Girls Camp we’re Ireland. The theme is places. So we had a session of learning about Ireland.

The answers to "what do you know about Ireland?" went something like this:

“Shamrocks!”

“Green!”

“North Ireland and regular Ireland don’t like each other.”

“Really? That’s awkward.”

Of course that was followed by a rousing game of "Do You Love Your Neighbor," in which I took a seat for saying "No, but I love everyone who knows the words to a Justin Bieber song" and remained seated for "No, but I love anyone who has read a Twilight book."

--

Husband played in a church softball game this week. The team lost. I got the eye for yelling “go baby!” onto the field (court? Field?) but you know what, my husband prefers cheers over jeers, thank you much.

Also, I gave myself supportive wife points because the game started at 9 p.m. and I drove straight over after my statistics class. This meant I was gone from home and everything from 8 a.m. to 10:30 p.m. and it was a long day.

--

Yesterday, we split up some of the food shopping. I stopped at the grocery store on my way home from work, husband went to Costco. I realize that everything could have been picked up in one place, but there are some things you should never buy bulk. Tampax for example. It is depressing to think, “oh my goodness, I’m going to have to use every single one of those.”

And generally when you’re out purchasing Tampax, it isn’t a good idea to be depressed.

--

This weekend means yoga, time with a stats tutor and a hike with friends. I’m looking forward to it all. Before the heart-breaking mani pedi on Saturday, I went to yoga with my mom. I’ve never sweated so hard in any workout. Amazing.

--

State Farm has made me a lifelong customer. My ring wasn’t insured, but they were able to cover a portion per our renters policy. They cut the check Saturday. The day I reported the ring. I already have it. With that, we’re starting a bank account and “operation new ring” this weekend.

--

Also. I wish I had been at the White House for this:

To gel

For me, and for countless other young women, leading organized religious communities is not about stepping outside of the bounds of femininity, it's about being exactly who we are, complete with all of our insecurities, in a space that allows us to just be.

Loved this column by Kate Fridkis about women and religion. In her words, she’s “a young woman who leads a congregation on the weekends and blogs about body image during the week.”

Dear Kate, can we be friends?

I've worried too much about being a "good Mormon." Especially since taking on the title of married, as a matriarch of a family, albeit a small one. Current members include husband, a puppy and a pedipaws device that we are cuddling and telling “good girl” and treating like family, in hopes said puppy will cease her fear of it, crawl up on my lap and demand that her nails be manicured.

I think that my husband would consider me faithful. Though sometimes my eyes get dozy during scripture reading, and lets be honest, hubs just pretty much reads the scriptures to me as I fall asleep. I’m pretty sure we’re somewhere in or around Third Nephi at this point. But I go to a lot more meetings than he does and, well, I think that should count.

I do feel feminine when worshipping, when being a part of something that is bigger than I am. In having a clear cut purpose. My life is so scattered, I need that.

However. My visiting teacher supervisor, who sends me guilt-trippy emails weekly, likely thinks I’m the worst offender out there. I probably am. I don't think I've been since July and honestly, I haven't made much effort.

But religion isn't ever any one thing, just like people aren't, and I keep thinking about how funny it is that I live in a world where there is a sex-crazed, nit-picking God who doesn't want women to get out of line, and at the same time, being a woman and leading a religious congregation is completely normal for me. In fact, I can't separate the leading-a-congregation from the being-a-woman. Life's full of fascinating dichotomies and contradictions, isn't it? I really believe that if I go to the gym that means I get to eat as much ice cream as I want afterward. What? That's how it works, isn't it?

This past Sunday in church, I happily accepted compliments for a new dress, though my thankfully-long hair was hiding some peeping underwear. Hey, my mom scored the dress for $10 at Downeast Outfitters, it doesn’t get more Mormon than that. Thought the people who sat behind me in sacrament meeting probably didn’t appreciate the peep show.

Or perhaps I misinterpreted the averted eyes. And I wanted to say, "Hello people, two square inches of white fabric. Get over it."

But I didn't.

I'm not a good Jewish woman to some. When I walk by them on the way home from the subway on the Upper West Side, the Orthodox men standing outside the building next to mine scowl briefly at me or ignore me completely. I am not dressed appropriately. I am wearing jeans and a tee-shirt. And a Star of David. Sometimes I like to wear a clingy red dress and tremblingly high gold heels. And a Star of David. I can tell they can't stand me.

Of course, as of late my biggest religious dilemma is convincing a bunch of teenagers, that yes, they still need to go to girls camp, even though it is scheduled during the release of Eclipse (the new vampire movie).

Last night, as I giggled and played hide-and-go-seek in the dark with teenagers, it occurred to me that no matter the mountain of homework and dust awaiting me at home, I couldn't think of being any happier anywhere else.

And too short of a time later when I iced an injured knee and wiped away the tears of a Beehive, I was overwhelmed with love and felt so blessed to have a connection with the girls. I let her squeeze my hand hard as the bishop gave her a blessing, and then sent her on her way with her parents.

Everything can get very dangerous when the wrathful, obsessive God is involved. Who should take out the recycling can become a cosmic battle. Women can be negated. But then, in the same moment in time, in the moment where I'm living, some people's God is completely fine with skinny jeans, a tank top, a Star of David, and a young woman who leads a congregation on the weekends and blogs about body image during the week.

Couldn't have ever said it better.

180th LDS General Conference

Conference and Easter are an interesting juxtaposition. On one side, you're hearing from church leaders and the talks on the atonement and resurrection are beautiful.

On the other side, you don't leave the house, take the sacrament or really participate in anything churchy. I do love being able to roll out of bed to the sound of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir though.

Some highlights:

On service...
"On this Easter Sunday, and every day, as we contemplate with reverence and awe how our Savior embraces us, comforts us and heals us, let us commit to become his hands, that others through us may feel his loving embrace." - President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, second counselor of the First Presidency

On pornography/self-control...
"Start by separating yourself from people, materials and circumstances that will harm you," he said. "As those battling something like alcoholism know, the pull of proximity can be fatal. So, too, in moral matters. Like Joseph in the presence of Potiphar's wife, just run — run as far away as you can get from whatever or whomever it is that beguiles you."

"...The only real control is self-control." - Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the 12 Apostles (This talk was amazing. He's one of my faves to listen too)

On the atonement...
"Should you have been disobedient to his commandments and feel unworthy, recognize that this is why the Lord Jesus Christ laid down his life. Through his Atonement, he has opened forever the opportunity to overcome such mistakes, to repent of improper choices and to conquer the negative effects of a life contrary to his teachings." - Elder Richard G. Scott of the Quorum of the 12 Apostles

"The empty tomb that first Easter morning was the answer to Job's question, 'If a man die, shall he live again?' To all within the sound of my voice, I declare, If a man die, he shall live again." - President Thomas S, Monson, president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (several talks on the atonement, nice to listen to)

On women...
"Popular culture today often makes women look silly, inconsequential, mindless and powerless. It objectifies them and disrespects them and then suggests that they are able to leave their mark on mankind only by seduction — easily the most pervasively dangerous message the adversary sends to women about themselves."
"...Look to your faithful mothers for a pattern to follow. Model yourselves after them, not after celebrities whose standards are not the Lord's standards, and whose values may not reflect an eternal perspective. Look to your mother. Learn from her strengths, her courage and her faithfulness. Listen to her. She may not be a whiz at texting; she may not even have a Facebook page. But when it comes to matters of the heart and the things of the Lord, she has a wealth of knowledge." - Elder M. Russell Ballard, of the Quorum of the 12 Apostles (good talk, though I will go to my grave saying that a girl wearing an immodest dress does not make a man sin. A man makes his own sins, just like a girl is responsible for her own actions)

I need to read President Beck and Elder Packer's talks again. Still surprised that the first two talks in conference were on gender roles. They aren't my favorite speakers either so when I read their talks back-to-back, it was a little bit of an "oy vey" moment.

Thoughts?

A feminine feminist

Republishing this because apparently it disappeared... wanted to link to it for a post this week and it was gone from the archives. Thank heavens I'm vain enough to subscribe to my own blog on Google Reader and could grab the text. Sad that the comments will be all gone, but oh well.


It was a typical Sunday morning. Husband and I were totally late to church, mostly my fault. But I looked cute, wet bun and all. We made it just in time to take the sacrament, and then slip into the back to the hard chairs.

One of the speakers* spoke to the importance of family. At some point he referenced his fears of being a good parent.

“But that’s OK, I knew I had a great first counselor with me to help.”

I bristled. No one is the president of my family, neither is anyone second in command as the first counselor.**

That is why I am a feminist.

Feminism, in its most basic sense, according to the American Heritage Dictionary, means a “belief in the social, political and economic equality of the sexes.”

No bra burning required, and a negative on a crazy haircut or sexual preference. You can wear Anthropolgie and put bows in your hair. The definition contains no mention of abortion, really. And no clause about having to support Hillary Clinton over Sarah Palin. You can be a stay at home wife or mother, or a CEO. Simply a belief in equality. Love this essay.

That belief in basic equality is why I am a feminist.

Mormons believe in a divine feminine, that someday we will become diety. We believe we have a Heavenly Father and a Heavenly Mother. I could embellish but that is a long post. But the belief that I will someday be a god, just like my husband, is why I am a feminist.

Also, that I believe gender or sex-related crimes are horrid, that men abusing women in crimes not of sexuality, but for dominance and power is horrid; that we even need a VAWA*** because crimes against women are so prevalent. That no woman is second in command because she is a woman.

That I believe I should be able to wear whatever I want, jog wherever I want,sleep wherever I want and not have to worry about what is going to happen to my body when I am doing it.

Rest in peace, Chelsea King and so many others.

That I believe men should be able to do the same. That no one is better than any other, based on gender, religion or really anything else. Loved Sanda Bullock's acceptance speech.

That when we stop pushing each other down, we will be able to leap together to new heights. When we stop feeling threatened by others power or stop using gender to control, we will soar.

That is why I am a feminist.

I thought this post would be earth-shattering. That I would be able to compose my thoughts on why I think it is absurd to hear "you can't be Mormon and a feminist!" But it isn't. It is a simple, not crazy post about simply saying a hurrah to equality, to a balance on the scale and a no to being pushed to the back.



Too many asterisks:
*Great people, great family. It was even a great talk. But I’m raising the flag of equality here, where no one is runner up.
** In the Mormon religion, several leadership groups are organized into "presidencies" -- ask in I currently serve as the second counselor in the Young Womans Presidency for my ward. Husband is in the Elders Quorum presidency. There is a president who oversees the leadership of the group and is assisted by counselors and usually a secretary.

Family connections

Do you ever have moments that make you want to learn all about your history?

I just had one of those. My great-great uncle's (is that what I'd call my dad's grandpa's brother?) project Nineteenth-Century Publications about the Book of Mormon (1829-1844 is now available as an online digital collection at the Harold B. Lee Library at BYU.

What is cool about that is that it is informally referred to as the Kirkham Project -- and I am a Kirkham. The name is in honor of my great-great uncle Francis W. Kirkham. In 1930s he collected newspaper articles about the Book of Mormon from New England and Ohio papers

He recognized the importance of archiving and sorting these things (hmm, maybe I should to and dust off my half-kept journals). The compilation is now more than 600 documents, almost one million words, published about the Book of Mormon during the Prophet Joseph Smith’s lifetime. The intention of the collection was to bring together everything, from whatever perspective, both detractors and defenders of the church in it's early history.

He seems like someone who I would have been fascinated to listen to, as I love history and love reading both sides of any story.

My dad said that Francis and his brother, my great-grandfather Oscar A. Kirkham were frequenters of Lamb's Grill and Cafe -- which coins itself as "Utah's oldest most famous restaurant." I've never been and I've heard the food isn't too hot, but now I want to go. If only to feel more linked to those in my past.

Found in San Diego: Mormon Battalion Historic Center

also known as "Mormon Disneyland" to our Young Women. We took them there for a Tuesday night activity -- and I gotta say, it was so much cooler than I thought it would be

The old center was basically a place we'd park our car to go to events in Old Town. They had spiritual videos and such, and a few artifacts, but it wasn't much. So we'd walk in, shake hands with the missionaries, acknowledge that we share the same religion and say "hey, can we park our car here while we go out to dinner?"
Because they have a big parking lot and no one was ever there.

For the past year, it has been under construction. It opened a few weeks ago and it is totally transformed. This is going on my list of "places to take people when they visit." The tour took just under an hour and we learned a lot. It is free too, which is a perk.

The girls, used to Disney's antics, loved it. Each room has a theme and it follows the Mormon Battalion's journey across the West. From Iowa to San Diego, where they helped build roads and buildings.

It is now a show, put on by sister missionaries, in pioneer garb. You follow the Mormon Battalion through its journey, moving from room to room. Each room represents a location, starting in Iowa territory, where the pioneers wintered in 1846 after being kicked out of Nauvoo, Illinois. Brigham Young, the prophet at the time, petitioned President James K. Polk for assistance in moving the pioneers westward. The answer was to use the Mormons to fight the Mexican war. A battalion of nearly 500 men and women was formed. They never shot anything but buffalo, but they raised some money to help move people West.

This room was a fort, where the battalion members were outfitted. Many chose to forgo a uniform so they could send the uniform allowance money back to their families.

The girls loved watching their friends get ready to go to "battle." They didn't so much love me taking pictures.

It was a reminder to me about how proud I am of my own pioneer heritage. If someone came to me and told me to give up my home and walk across the United States, I would laugh at them. But my ancestors did that, because of their faith. It lifts my faith.

The girls had a blast taking pictures in the end too. The pictures are a fun souvenir - and are totally free. They are printed out in sepia, you know "old fashioned."

San Diego Mormon Battalion Historic Site information from LDS.org.

Friday rants on eye liner and underwear

Do you ever become such a part of your own stereotype that you encourage it?

Lunch yesterday with some fabulous girls – they made a reference to a Mormon-owned business.
I was surprised. Especially when my little knowledge of the business knew it started in the South.

“Natalie, there are Mormons outside of Utah.”

Shoot.Why did that surprise me? I am one.

I put on eye liner to look good. I pull back my eyelid in the process, knowing this is going to give me crows feet in the future.

I drink through a straw to avoid stained teeth. But the sipping could give me lip wrinkles.

Are you a fan of meetup.com? I am going to go to a yoga meetup tomorrow I think (no guaruntees, sometimes I become shy at the last minute). We have met amazing friends at the pug meetups. Meeting people online is the new bar.

I blogged about Google Buzz on my posterous, kind of a beginner's info about privacy settings and such.

Speaking of being Mormon… I have a issue to pick with President Monson. Wearing the prescribed underwear is a struggle. I don’t appreciate that they just redid my favorite kind (they come in different fabrics) and stopped making my size! How do those things relate? OK, we’re going to redo this and stop making a size? I am short and squatty, I come from a log line of short and squatty women. We thrive on the petite section. Trial of faith I tell you.

Sorry if the underwear rant makes sense to no one. But seriously. I got a comment card and I'm writing in.

What I meant to say

The first Sunday of each month at a LDS church is "fast and testimony meeting." Members are instructed to fast for two meals before attending, and after the sacrament is passed, the meeting is open for anyone to speak.

Sometimes this means some interesting times. I do believe at some point in the past two years my ward has been chastised by a Seventh Day Adventist. From our own pulpit. Awesome day. And of course there are good, uplifting moments too. 

Today somehow I felt as though I should speak. The words were in my head. But when I went up there, I totally bombed it. My voice was shaky, my speech was slow, unsure.

The nerves turned into anxiety and I'm still shaking. I've heard it said, "if you can speak in church, you can speak anywhere." I guess I'm not there yet. 

What I wanted to say is that I've been thinking about why I am Mormon lately. I've been thinking about why the heck I'm religious.

Why, when I believe in equality of the sexes, do I attend a church in which that is not consistently present? Or why, when I have been insulted and offended by church leaders, do I continue to return each week? The whole Prop 8 debacle, if I even dare bring it up. Despite me missing the past two weeks of Sunday school because I just didn't want to debate Eve's roll in the Fall. 

It comes down to the inability to deny it. And the strength that I have within because of it.

That I believe in the truth of the teachings and that I can look past the imperfections, as I hope that others can do with me. 

I am healthier, stronger mentally by not partaking in substances (I think I would make a horribly drunk). I know He answers my prayers. My beliefs keep my marriage strong, as a friend in my MBA cohort noted one day, because we're both working for the same thing, with the same idea of what marriage is.

For others, their life works just fine. But for me, this works. It has built my character and built me into a stonger person - even if I have reservations about some things, globally I am sustained in faith.

But should it all came to an end, and my beliefs in eternity are not quite true, I will be OK. Because I lived with hope. And happiness.

That's what I meant to say. If only I was a speaker not a writer.

Photo

Teens say the darndest

There comes a minute when you must write things down. I absolutely love my church calling. I spend a few hours every week with the most fabulous teenagers.There are definitely some quoteable moments.

A few Sundays ago, the teacher was trying to explain that prayer is more than lip service. Which then required a need to explain lip service. Upon hearing the definition, a girl said.

"Oh, that's what Obama does."

The next week while playing Catchphrase...

"They drink a lot of water!"

"Fish!"

(the answer was camel)

12-year-old: "I am..."

That was the only clue she gave. The answer was beautiful. She is.

Same 12-year-old: "I never look in this"

"MIRROR" so said five people. The answer was dictionary.

Whether it is being told I absolutely can't dance or turning up the car radio for a certain song -- I absolutely love the third hour of church and Tuesday nights. And any random blather between.

Mary had a little baby

This season I always feel grateful. Moreso than at Thanksgiving, for this is the season to remember the birth of my Savior.

And believe me, I need some saving. So I am grateful.

Surrounding the Bountiful LDS Temple are pretty homes that have created this series of signs. We drove through slowly and each took turns reading the scriptures out loud.

So grateful for my family in this season too.

I hope you have a happy holiday today. Merry Christmas.

If the scriptures seem a little choppy it is because not all of my pictures turned out.

There is also a street in Sugarhouse in Salt Lake City that has been doing "Bible Street" for fifty years.

The Mormon Christmas Party

The San Diego 8th Ward partied it up on Saturday. More mashed potatoes than I've ever seen. I love some mashed potatoes.

Hubs and I wore red and green. Separately. Together, we were festive. It fit with the cheesy festivity of the evening.

Several hundred people and reusable plates. Now that is green and a lot of work. Kudos. Kudos.

The food was good. There were some fancy elements. Including a chocolate fountain. But after watching (sweet) teens and kids enjoy the fountain by double dipping skewers, we thought twice.

I love this girl. She participated so much in my church lesson on Sunday, can't thank her enough. Her participation in the chocolate fountain excelled all however. It was awesome.

Somehow we ended up at Yogurtland post-party. Somehow. OK, we abandoned the party halfway through the skit about not letting the holidays become a frenzied time of buying the latest ang greatest. It was narrated by a disgruntled wise man and an angel. Awesomness.

I think the amoount newlywedded and young married couples in our ward has doubled this year. At least. It has made church so much fun. I love the pals we've had at church since moving her two years ago, but it is fun to have more pals too!

First ward Christmas party I left husband there to find a way home because I felt like I was never going to fit in. Now, I do. I think I've blogged about it a lot, but it brings me joy often. I know church isn't supposed to be about the socialization, but there is a lot of socializing that goes on, so it is nice when it fits.

Thankful

People on the streets of New York City are asked "what are you thankful for?" This video is the result.


I am most definitely thankful for my husband, family, and my faith. Sometimes I wonder "what if I die and its not true, I lived my life like this for nothing?"

But then I realize I just know that it is something. I have something to live for. I know who I am. I know where I am going. And I am so grateful for that.

And goodness, I wish I worked for the church media relations department right now. YouTube, RSS, Twitter, I'm in love. And of course the past year has been a roller coaster, which in media world is exciting.

Via Eyes Like Mine and just about every other blog out there. But I couldn't resist posting it again. It is perfect.

Suction

There I was vacuuming on a Saturday morning in a house not my own.

It was our turn to clean the building where we attend church. Windows were washed, bathrooms scrubbed, chalkboards wiped and I carried around an industrial vac to clean classrooms.

I wheeled from room to room, debating on whether or not to wrap the cord up each time. Because I was just going to unwrap it. I thought about how I never cleaned the church growing up because there were janitors in those days.

But our church decided that tithing money best be used for things like service and to build temples and chapels so there I was. I agree with the decision. Though dearest Salt Lake City, I think upgraded equipment would be awesome. A 14-year-old was pushing an older version of this thing around:

It was something doable. Easy. And every room had a memory. The Sunday School room where we listen to scripture and I have a personal goal to make one comment a week. The primary room with the little folding chairs. The room where my husband attends class. And of course the room that I meet with the girls for the Young Womens program.

Every swipe of the vacuum I though of memories, how this building has evolved from a place of newness to one of familiarity.

We were finished in 90 minutes. We parted ways until Sunday. We returned to a clean building.

While there were definitely some grumblies (hey, I missed Degrassi), it was a reminder that service doesn't have to be something totally difficult. It is often something that is taken for granted -- until we arrive for class and find a room covered in crumbs. Then the clean floors are noted forever.

P.S. Volunteer San Diego has a list of things to do around the holidays too. I'll never forget the Christmas morning we ran downstairs to find no presents, just a note to go visit the VA Hospital. Best Christmas morning ever. And gifts did materialize later. Amazing.

P.P.S. Could you por favor re-enter the spa giveaway? Somehow my spreadsheet disappeared and all was lost. Totally bummed.

Black and White Party

Another church  in the area* invited our youth to a "black and white scary night" party. The concept was so simple, but fun. Everyone dressed up in black and white and we watched the very clean, but still jumpy Audrey Hepburn flick "Wait Until Dark."

They had homemade root beer, cupcakes, kettle corn, oreos, rice krispies -- all treats that are easy to make or buy and serve. The kettle corn made an absolute mess, so perhaps they didn't take into account that the 13-year-old girls might get bored and start a popcorn fight.

Decorations were easy too -- since we were watching a movie, the lights were off. They placed black crepe paper over the entryways, decorated the food table and the stage (all Mormon churches, at least every one that I've been to, have stages. We like to party, perform, etc.) where the movie was projected.

I thought it was cute, a great idea and super easy.

*By church, I mean another LDS ward and they invited area youth in the stake -- which is a group of wards. But that lingo can get distracting when I'm just trying to talk about how cute the cupcakes were.

A big fat conference recap

The semiannual general conference of my church was this weekend. Often known as church on TV in our house, it is four sessions of church leaders speaking, two on Saturday and two on Sunday. Oh, and a special session for men on Saturday night. Women have their special session the week before on Saturday night.

Now, that probably sounds like an enormous load of church, and it is. But it is a lot of spirituality in a good way. Millions tune in from around the world. The conference is translated real-time into 92 languages. Rough transcripts of the talks are already up on the MormonTimes, and I've posted some of my favorite quotes. One of my favorite assignments as a reporter was covering General Conference.

The Conference Center in Salt Lake City, photo

There were so many great talks. I love pulling one up on a lunch break at work and reading it. One of the major themes seemed to be about love. For God, for each other, for community, for people making harmful choices. Just love.

President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, who is quickly becoming one of my favorite apostles to listen to. He is currently serving as the second counselor in the First Presidency.

"Love is the healing balm that repairs rifts in personal and family relationships," he added. "It is the bond that unites families, communities and nations. Love is the power that initiates friendship, tolerance, civility and respect. It is the source that overcomes divisiveness and hate. Love is the fire that warms our lives with unparalleled joy and divine hope. Love should be our walk and our talk."

President Uchtdorf said that when one understands what it means to love as Jesus Christ loves mortals, "the confusion clears and our priorities align. Our walk as disciples of Christ becomes more joyful. Our lives take on new meaning. Our relationship with our Heavenly Father becomes more profound. Obedience becomes a joy rather than a burden."

In the men's priesthood session, President of the Church Thomas S. Monson counseled against anger. One of my Institute of Religion teachers in college always stressed that anger is a secondary emotion that we choose, so I am glad that he reminded me of that.

"To be angry is to yield to the influence of Satan," said President Monson in his concluding address of Saturday night's priesthood session in the Conference Center. "No one can make us angry. It is our choice. If we desire to have a proper spirit with us at all times, we must choose to refrain from becoming angry. I testify that such is possible."

Elder Russell M. Nelson went tech. After all, prayer uses no cell phone minutes.

More amazing than modern technology is mankind's opportunity "to access information directly from heaven, without hardware, software or monthly service fees. ... It almost sounds too good to be true. But it is true! I have received and responded to that heavenly help."

I know these men are inspired by the Lord and love listening to them. I know that Christ lives.

Edification

We started the weekend going to the symphony. It was opening night for the season. I liked getting all fancy and going out with the husband.

We were 45 minutes early. Too late to grab food, but definitely early enough to get bored. So we took pictures, and then got yelled at for taking pictures.

I'll admit, the symphony probably didn't want to know that uncivilized people like this were going to the symphony.

The symphony is a time for thought. I don't sit still too well.

I think about my day, and then the fast crescendos creep into my thoughts and make me feel like I'm running through a forest and the softer tunes make me think about dancing on a hill top, Sound of Music style.

It is meditation set to music.

The first chair violinist gets a lot of attention. He is in charge of making sure everyone is in tune.

But I look at the second chair violinist. What is his story? Does he constantly feel like he is just not good enough. Did he mess up his audition? Were there politics involved? I mean, they play for the symphony, they are all good.

Then we walked the streets of downtown starving. Oh by the way, I found leggings I like. They are more like pants and are even a tad loose when compared with other leggings. I wore them Friday night and continued wearing them well into Saturday afternoon.

We ended up grabbing Sushi Deli takeout -- calling as we headed over there. I know there are fancier sushi places out there, but I can't make myself spend more when $12 makes my tummy happy.

The true edification came this weekend, as we watched the semiannual LDS General Conference. We watch via Internet at home. It is amazing to me to think that I'm watching the same thing as millions of people around the world. People who share my faith, and make me feel like I'm a part of something bigger than myself.



*Someone once asked how we manage to get freebie tickets for so many things. It is a perk of my industry. And sometimes the fact that people know we're poor.

Is it that obvious?

So I tried dim sum for the first time this week. Not my favorite, but happy I can say I've tried it. Went with some coworkers not in my department, so I gave myself points for mingling.

On the way back, I mumbled something about liking the area we live in because gas is cheaper and we like the people we go to church with and we're near Costco. All in one breath, I swear.

"Your church, its the Mormon church, right," coworker asked.

"Yes, how did you know?" I say.

"Its kind of obvious."

"Oh really? That's awkward."

I never thought that I wear my religion on my sleeve. But if I do, I have decided that its not awkward. I am proud of what I believe in. I just never realized that my cubicle life broad casted my belief in God.

I know I do on the blog at times, so maybe I should expect that I do in real life.

In a related but unrelated news, these videos about Mormons are unofficial but awesome. This one is about going to church and it is fairly true.



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